Change the way you think. Create magic in your life!™

Hello all,

I’m leading with the article and have followed it with some personal updates, as well as the “Mind Food” section.

You can also listen to or download the shorter audio version of this article on my podcast site at . It will be the first one up on the left-hand motivational side. It’s titled: “Co-Worker Resentment.”


Q: I have to work with this person I really can’t stand. He gripes and complains and never pulls his own weight. I have to do some of his work and I really resent him for it. Everyone in the office knows this including my boss, but no one has done anything about it.

A: It’s unfortunate that you boss ignores this behavior. However, you will never be able to change your boss nor your lazy co-worker. Therefore, you will have to change your feelings toward this coworker.

Q: How do I do that?

A: One way is to sit down with your boss and go over your job description and what he/she expects you to do. Do not bring up your co-worker, even if you boss asks you why you asked for this meeting. It’s about you and your boss coming to an understanding about you and what is expected of you. It’s not about anyone else or what is expected from anyone else.

You may ask your boss, “What if others approach me to handle their job, what would you suggest that I do?” Your boss may respond with, “Is someone doing that?” Your response could be, “It has happened and I don’t like to make a fuss, but I have my own job to do and I want to do it well. So, I was just asking what you would suggest that I do should that situation arise.”

Deal with his/her response as politician might deal with an issue – be polite and don’t say too much. What you have done is subconsciously let your boss know that YOU know that someone else is slacking off and now your BOSS knows that YOU know. You have now mentioned the issue without actually mentioning the issue.

Q: What if my boss says, “Just tell me if that happens.”

A: When it does happen, go to your boss and do one of two things: Remind your boss of your conversation and tell him/her the situation or go to your boss and say, “(Employee) asked me to do this, and I’m busy doing my own job, perhaps you can find someone else who can handle this.” Either of these steps can aid you in forcing your boss to deal with the issue.

The second way to deal with the lazy co-worker is to not judge his/her behavior and realize that is how that person has currently chosen to journey through life. You also have a choice, which is how you deal with that person. Should that person come to you and ask you to do something that is his/her responsibility, politely decline, state that you are very busy, and suggest that he/she should ask the boss for some guidance.

No doubt your co-worker will not do this because he/she innately knows that his/her behavior is wrong and will find someone else to do his/her work. Additionally, make sure that you respond this way every time this event occurs. The reason this co-worker chooses you is because he/she senses a form of weakness. You have been trying to be nice and help out, but a user always interprets niceness as weakness. By refusing to play their game, the weakness that the user employee senses will be dissolved and they will find someone else to use and you will not have to deal with this issue again.

Q: What if my fellow employee resents me for doing this? I don’t want any problems at work.

A: Don’t you resent your co-worker doing this to you? If your co-worker REALLY cared about how you felt, he/she wouldn’t treat you this way. With regard to not wanting any problems at work – your co-worker not doing his/her job and getting you to cover for them IS a problem. You have to change the way you feel about your co-worker. This co-worker is not your friend – because friends don’t use one another. You can either deal with this issue or continue to suffer and remember no one can ever make you suffer…without your permission.

Personal Update: It’s been a busy few months, so this is late getting out. My schedule slows down as we near the holidays, so I will be able to get more newsletters and podcasts out. The shows and speeches have been great, but the travel has been hard – lots of delays, but I always made it on time to the show! Thank you to all my clients for utilizing my services this year and for booking me for next year, as well. I’m looking forward to being on board with you all!

By the way, throughout my travels, I always appreciate those whom I meet that tell me that they read my newsletter and/or listen to my podcasts. I hope that you find them inspiring and informative, as well as helpful. Your feedback is appreciated.

With regard to the podcasts, we are quickly reaching over 30,000 listeners a month, which, as you can imagine, is quite a feat. Thank you, again, to those of you who share or encourage others to take a listen. In case you missed it above - the podcasts are at .

Business Blog: I have been updating my business blog - - with where I have been as well as some articles and information on how to improve trade show and meeting results and even tips on how others can heighten their speaking skills.

“A lazy person, whatever the talents with which he set out, will have condemned himself to second-hand thoughts and to second-rate friends.” – Cyril Connolly, author.

“Offer the lazy an egg, and they'll want you to peel it for them” – Anonymous.

“Remember STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS!” – Anonymous.

“We know communication is a problem; but the company will not discuss this issue with their employees.” – Dilbert.
Bob Garner
+1.805.534.1576 (International)

You have been sent this email message because you have been sent a postcard from Motivative & Communicative Concepts in the past 6 months, have signed up for the Personal Success Newsletter from our web site or have exchanged business cards with Bob. To be removed automatically from our newsletter, click here.

If you are receiving duplicate emails from this list, please send an email to with your email address.